The theme of this poem is hardly new, the idea we learn that love isn’t given unconditionally but must be earned through performance, through accomplishment. It isn’t the lesson our parents wanted us to learn, and it’s certainly not the lesson the Holy One—if you believe in a Holy One—wants us to learn. But here we are.
Even on the far side of the hill, over 50, I find this nonsense still chasing me. If I haven’t been A Perfect Young Lady, modest and demure even while achieving the highest performance and also smiling while I do it—if I haven’t made you feel warm and welcome and wanted and happy—if I haven’t succeeded in earning your esteem—then I have failed. It sounds ridiculous that way, doesn’t it? But feelings are not rational, so here we are.
Maybe after you’ve listened to this poem, you might call someone or text them and tell them you love them even when they make mistakes and don’t wash their hair and begrudge the effort. Because truly, the well of love is bottomless.
Love Lesson by Heather L. Rollins, January 8, 2025 I learned early that the path to love is performance. The coin to buy love is doing a good job and smiling while you do it And doing it better than I ever did it before I was a greedy wee thing I wanted all the love I could get Everyone I met, they had to love me like me feel happy to see me stay with me take care of me I say this as if it weren’t still true even though the well of love is bottomless.
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